Ok, you always hear looks aren't everything. Is this a true statement? Although looks may not be EVERYTHING, we all have that one thing that attracts us to the opposite sex, or sometimes even the same sex. How you doin? I must admit I am a prisoner of physical attraction. I think we all are guilty of desiring an attractive mate. I've heard some women say they only date ugly men because they don't have to worry about other women talking to their man. Ladies, that only works for women. Men will talk to anything! Lol. The saying goes "looks fade". What do you look for in a mate? Honestly!
I can't lie, i gotta have an attractive man. Thats just me, and most of the time they haven't been worth a damn.
ReplyDeleteI just love a man with a nice chest. And that usually what I notice first. However, it doesn't mean I desire a relationship with this person.
ReplyDeleteLooks for me are probably 3rd on my list. A gentleman has to be able not only to catch my attention, but keep it. In order to keep it he must be able to stimulate me with great conversation, open up and let me find out what he has going on. It's okay if he is easy on the eyes I could not wake up to a Flava Flav! I would prefer an average looking guy who had himself together rather than an Appollo(Housewives of ATL), looks and no brains!
ReplyDeleteSo if he looked like Flav, but was intelligent and very successful, he couldn't holla? So you throw out 1 and 2 on your list if he's butt ugly?
ReplyDeleteMe personally, I think MOST (not all) people that are attractive, have been told that all of their lives and they stand behind their looks, and play on that "i'm gorgeous, look at me" attitude before anything else. I have met some very beautiful women with an attitude so jacked up, you can't stand to even be around them. I could tolerate average with a great personality over beautiful any day.
ReplyDeleteMy mom always said I would end up with an ugly wife. Because I was always "looks first".
@Prez I have to be able to want to look at the brother, especially in the morning. Again, my preference/choice is an average brother. My number 1 is how he treats his mom, followed by his stability. Intelligent, very successful, and looks like Flav sorry, but it dont cut it for me!
ReplyDeleteThe key word for me when it comes to looks is "Average", my average may be considered not attractive to some. The bottom line is we like who we like!
The wonderful thing about life is...Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. I would love nothing better then to wake up beside a man that looks so good to me that with crust in his eyes and slob on his face, he still makes my heart(s) throb. LOL A beautiful person that is created from the inside out is just what I'm looking for. The physical appearance fades with time, but the beauty of the heart grows, glows and Explodes!
ReplyDeleteYeah yeah, that is the politically correct thing to say, and it sounds good, but we all know deep down initially what we're attracted to. If a not so attractive man shoots you his number, how likely are you to call? Verses Shabba Ranks handing you his number? SHABBA
ReplyDeleteGotta agree wit Jay, when you first meet a person you don't have a clue as to what type of person they are. There has to be something that draws you to them right off the bat.
ReplyDeleteExactly Pat, all that mushy stuff happens further down the road. All we know today is she's got a nice body, all her teeth, most of her own hair and smells nice. Lol
ReplyDelete@ Jay yes I agree....deep down we know what we are initally attracted to. Yes what is pleasing to the eye at first sight would be important in possibly continuing conversation.....But wasn't the question asked what do you look for in a mate?
ReplyDeleteHaha...we goin in today!
ReplyDelete@Total yes, but how important is physical attraction when dating, which ties into what you look for in a mate initially, not after you have grown on one another. At that point does it even matter? Lol
ReplyDeleteWell I have to agree that those of us that hear we are gorgeous all the time can let it affect our ability to date without bias. Although it creates a bias humility is what helps the puffed up deflate. I know that I am attractive both mentally and physically but I also know that my beauty will fade (sike...lol) seriously though anything can happen to affect your outter appearance and then all you have left is mental. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder I have seen some unattractive (ugly is such a harsh word) women with the finest men and vice versa!! And the man treated her like ashe was the most beautiful woman in the world (seriously) a lot of oeople would whisper and say how in the hell did she get him!! But all I would see in his eyes was "I am the lucky one". It was fascinating to me...so with all that said I still would not marry a unattractive guy (sorry to be shallow) I justt could not do it Shabba gets no digits here. Now average joe yes! Butt ugly no (I have to think about our future kids...LOL). To the ladies a little piece of advice for you...be what you desire. What am I saying? You cannot be a nickel looking for a dime and mad when all you can find is a penny. If you desire a man with a nice body...go to the gym!! Get your self tight and right! If you desire a man with some intelligience...get your GED (just throwing in some humor...LOL) but seriously I hear women all the time complaining about what men look like or don't look like...trust me they critique us to!! When I look in the mirror I see a "Queen" all day everyday and I want nothing less than royalty!! But shoot who doesn't want to meet there frog prince...LOL At the end of the day you set your own standard not mommie, daddy, reality TV, facebook, sister, brother, of BFF....YOU DO IT!! At the end of the day and bright in the morning you have to wake up and look at your decision....
ReplyDeleteGive me a nice booty and i'm sold! Lol
ReplyDeleteYeah anon. A big butt and a smile...
ReplyDeleteWe can agree to disagree, but the fact is that there was an initial physical attraction that caused us to look and sometimes do a double take of a person. Yes, we all know that looks fade, but lets face it most people are thinking about the now and not the later. Remember we all view people through a set of different eyes, and what may be appealing to one person may not be to another!
ReplyDeleteAlright, lets keep this one-hunnit.... I cannot and will not kick it with a man who I am not even remotely attracted to. Period. Call it what you want. If his a$$ got a yuck mouth and a Hurricane Chris (Ay Bay-Bay) bird chest, 4' 10" with high heel boots on, a wandering eye like a cyclops, etc., NO you can't have my number, NO I don't want a drink so quit following me around the club and YES I got a man! You are entitled to pick and choose who you would and would not involve yourself with. Don't feel guilty about it, you don't owe anyone an explanation, do you. Like April said in the beginning, some of the finest ones turn out to be worth less than a dayum. However, your INITIAL reaction will be that you want to at least be able to tolerate looking at this person without turning into stone. (LOL) Know this, though, if you set your requirements TOO high, it'll be harder to find your match and you might end up alone longer than you care to be. Now to answer the question--What do you look for in a mate? (Initial attraction): A well groomed man with a big back can always get my stamp of approval....I'm just sayin'....
ReplyDeleteMo...a big back? I'm confused...LOL I feel you tho girl. It is your choice who you want to entertain and you are right about high expectations. We all have high expectations though, especially successful women. Let's face it I want someone going in the same direction as me physically, mentally and financially. Again, average is ok with me but must have a nice body....period! I am a touchy feely person.
ReplyDeleteGo Girl. Big as in broad and muscular, athletic. Not big as in fluffy. LOL!
ReplyDeleteMo u crazy! But truth be told the physical attraction is definitely important, there's just no way to sugar coat it. Like someone said all the other intangibles come down the line. If you're not attracted physically it aint happening.
ReplyDeleteThe issue is whether or not physical attraction is important, and whether the person is average in your eyes, or in the eyes of the beholder and all that other nonsense. The answer still comes out YES! Hell yeah its important!
ReplyDeleteMo...ok I can definitely high five you on that...I like to be picked up and carried...oh wait just had a moment. OK I'm back...LOL
ReplyDeleteLOL Candi and I agree girlfriend, there's no way to sugar coat it.... @Go Girl: ROFL! ^5!! We all grown up in here, shoOOooo. If u want to say you like getting hopped around the kitchen like Ving did Jodi's mom (Baby Boy); then girl SAY IT! I feel you on that! LOLOL!
ReplyDeleteYa'll definitely wildin tonite..LMAO!
ReplyDeleteMo....BAHHHHHH!!! Girl u better know it!! Ain't nothing like a strong man! Girl I want to be hopped around the whole house...ok let me stop....Girl the bottom line is yes looks matter...Hell what is wrong with saying that....nothing. Anybody that sits and says it doesn't is only lying to themselves. What it boils down to is what you like eveybody not in to muscles and strength some just want a nice personality....I want that to but I must have something to look at!! Hell I'm giving him something to look at!
ReplyDeleteLMAO...SMDH..hilarious
ReplyDeleteGo Girl I'm over here LMAO! Ain't nothing like being hopped through the house by a skrong, big-backed bruh! Hop my arse around like he got rabbit in his family!! Mmm-kay kay kay? LML! Alright, lemme stop. This has taken a whole other turn!
ReplyDeleteMo...girl I am Hollin laughin in here "like he got rabbit in his family" hillarious!!!! Yes this has taken a different turn.....back to the topic at hand....LOL!!!
ReplyDelete@ the Sista's, that's what I'm talking about keeping it real. We know what we like and want, and thats that, but at the same time I have to be able to look at him. Can I get one standing in the kitchen body glistening like Ving scrambling me some eggs and drinking all the kool-aid, with a body like that dayum I wont even yell at him for drinking from the pitcher...lol! Ya'll sound like it's about to be a back blowing out session, oh hell count me in....lol..!!!
ReplyDeleteI see i've been missin all the action. Yes physical attraction is numero uno.
ReplyDeleteNothing like beautiful "Eye Candy"
ReplyDeleteI'm extremely attractive to a hardworking man. A man who knows what he wants and does what he needs to do to get it. A man that is family oriented and a man that treats his mother with respect. If he loves and respects his mother he will love and respect HIS WOMAN Completely....
ReplyDeleteTo all the faithful blogger's....I am definately enjoying this topic. The responses are hallarious. Keep up the good work Jay, I see you are really bringing on the HEAT!
ReplyDeleteSide Bar: Oh, and by the way, the guarantee of a man loving and respecting you because he loves his moms might be the practice, but its not the rule.
ReplyDeleteMo, so true!!!...Doesn't mean he will respect you the same.
ReplyDeleteYou better know it...I have met men that worship the ground their moms walk on but treat women like trash. It is a good practice to watch how he treats his mom but at the end of the day he's not sleeping with his mom, he's sleeping with you. One must remember that a man will only do what you allow him to do!!
ReplyDeleteTHANK YOU, Go Girl!! I couldn't have said it better myself. @April: I'm glad I'm not the only one who sees the flaws in that statement.
ReplyDeleteLooks are cool, but a mans word is so much more. Who wants a good looking man you cant depend on?
ReplyDelete@Chelz...You can say that again. So true!
ReplyDelete