In most cases, it is simply because they aren't getting enough. The urge to have more sex is generated in the same part of the brain as the urge to have another slice of chocolate cake. They also wanted a person who was not a threat to their wives or families.
Men are still biologically driven to provide for their females and ensure their children are safe. Marriage continues to provide the social, legal and security benefits. The introduction of sexual exclusivity to marriage was originally intended to ensure inheritances stay within families, if you use a non-biblical rationale, but given that the modern Will and Testament, monogamy is no longer relevant for that purpose.
Can men really be monogamous?
I would say 100 percent of men cannot be mentally monogamous, in that they are biologically programmed to assess the sexual attractiveness of every single woman they see. A normal man could also achieve monogamy with a highly-sex driven woman, as could a man with a low libido and a normal woman. However, a normal man and a normal woman who have decided on lifetime sexual exclusivity [could] face chances of divorce and a very high chance of cheating.
NO...However, you can use his nature to work for you, rather than against you. That means negotiating some infidelity if you are not “in the mood.” It does not have to be other lovers: It could be pornography, or a lap dance [at a strip club]. The important thing to remember is that "sex" is your man's strongest, most basic instinct, so working with it puts you in a position of power in the relationship. It is better to walk the dog on a leash, than to let it escape through an unseen hole in the back fence.
Also, never cross your legs for an extended period, that's opening the door to infidelity. Don't let yourself go, always keep yourself up. There is nothing less valued than a woman that no one else wants. Always remind him how valuable you are, how popular you are and drop "subtle" hints that other men still find you desirable. This will take advantage of his biological need to compete.
Remember this, IT HAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH LOVE!!! To sum it up best, it is truly the "nature" of the beast. I can honestly say, ALL MEN DO NOT CHEAT, but all men have cheated at some point and time in their lives. Most men I have interacted with in my travels will admit, as you age and mature, that desire eventually fades and you want to commit to that special woman. In these present days of, "what they don't know, won't hurt them" and "what happens here, stays here", we are finding faithfullness and loyalty to be a thing of the past.
CHEATING IS A CHOICE... NOT A MISTAKE!!!
Wow! this one is going to be a humdinger! Can't wait!
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with the point you made about CHEATING is wrong! It does cause pain and insecurities in relationships and it makes it just that much harder to trust that the next person you give yourself too doesn't make it a instant replay. SMH
ReplyDelete@Total, I understand you from a woman's point of view. As a man its like he said, having another slice of chocolate cake. Just can't explain it. I had a good woman and everything, f'ed it all up for nothing.+
ReplyDeleteLadies, and this is coming from a man's point of view...What is a girl to do?
ReplyDeleteHere u go, messin the game up for the brothas...Lmao. Nah, you doin ur thing man. Its mos def the truth!
ReplyDeleteJay now u know you opening up a can of worms..Haha
ReplyDeleteWhile I understand the logic behind the blog...my heart won't let me accept it. I likt the point you made that all me don't cheat...but I must say most do!! The irony of the entire situation is that men will pose the case that love has nothing to do with it. They often regret the act once it has been committed, yet they do it anyway. In reality cheating is devastating no matter who does it but my question is why do men expect women to just understand that it is in their nature, yet when a woman cheats the man is DONE, relationship over? Please help me understand that. if you can dish it out you better be able to take it but the pride of a man won't let him take his woman allowing another man to enter where he and he alone should only have access. Yet women feel the same way about there man. It is unfortunate that a person male or female cannot understand what that act does to the other person regardless of it meaning anything or not. My man could sleep with Esther from Sanford and son and it would be just as devastating to me as if it were Naomi Campbell. I believe that no one should make a commitment that they are not willing to keep especially marraige (forsaking all others) that is not just for the woman but for both. While relationships built on strong foundations can weather any storm I think infidelity is a hurricane that can leave a disaster in the wake of it and sometimes the strongest relationships cannot withstand the force.....
ReplyDeleteWow, he just had to go there with this one. I really think that's BS when it's said that cheating is part of a man's nature. I feel it's selfishness and greed and men need to take the time to see how their behavior is destructive. I'm speaking in terms of marriage (I dont count dating because no one belongs to the other)you destroy your relationship with God, you hurt your wife and if there are children they are affected. Your risk of getting a STD is so high that the numbers are off the charts. That's what you want to do to your family is it really worth it? If you are not ready to give that woman 100% then stay out in the game until you are sure and ready. Cheating is a choice and not an "OPTION" just like you chose to marry her, you can choose to be faithful. In some cases you can give a man all that he wants and more, he will still go out and cheat and I call that greed. He is only thinking about himself and getting that 2 seconds of something strange and not thinking about his wife and I call that selfish. What I've come to learn about some men they are not happy with themselves and cheating is their way of dealing with their own insecurities. For the record, I do not believe that all men have cheated, what I do believe is that a man or woman is capable of cheating and that goes back to us being imperfect people!
ReplyDelete@Go Girl, I agree, most men definitely look back and regret it. That is the part I guess we'll never understand. Then why in the hell did you do it!
ReplyDeleteDaddy's Girl, it is all of that, and noone goes into a marriage or relationship with the intention of getting some side action. What do we say? "It just happened". I can honestly admit I have not always been faithful, but damnit i've come a long way!
ReplyDeleteI know that once that trust is broken, it is hell trying to gain it back....
ReplyDelete@BB..LMAO.! At least you recognize your wrong and most of all I hope that you have grown, corrected, and learned from your mistake. If it happened more than once then damn, it was not a mistake it was your choice. Some men are not even able to come clean with their indiscretions, so I will give you some credit for that, because recognizing that you did wrong is the first part of correcting it. If youre not honest with yourself about what you did, then you can't be honest with the other person. So this goes back to a previous blog "Good Girls Gone Bad" so you see most men have created the bad girl!
ReplyDelete@Daddy's Girl.....You hit the nail on the head (most men have created the bad girl) and then they cheat and blame the woman for their intial indiscretions...SMH! It is funny how once we have "got ourselves together" we quickly forget all the things we have done and expect everything to be peaches and cream. We reap what we sow, so for most of us we need to go back and check what was planted that's for men and women cause now it is harvest time. We want apples but all we can find is oranges...SMH! Love knows how to behave and that is proven so for men to say it has nothing to do with love is a bit hard to digest. Either as women we have peeped the game time and time again and at the end of the day you have to take a risk, and take a man at his word and pray that your relationship can be everything that you both desire and expect. We also need to openly communicate to one another, communication is the key. Men are not the greatest communicators. Women by nature are the communicators in the relationship. COmmunication is a two way street when things are not going in the same direction then someone needs to address the issue. Instead of looking outside the confines of the relationship for temporary satisfaction.
ReplyDeleteMy daddy would say that it is the "cheat gene"...Haha
ReplyDeletewhat a pile of shit. poor writing and damaging to women. "never cross your legs for an extended period" WTF? what about men with low sex drives and women with high sex drives...THIS does exist too. basically this is all about women and how this is our fault. bullshit.
ReplyDelete